Folks,
I’m eating a piece of toast this morning, checking e-mails. Looks like my old comrade Dan Stuart is revving up for a college lecture circuit tour overseas. He’s got a new book out. Old songs to play. New songs, too. Bringing it to the people. Hand to hand combat.
Here are his tour dates:
Dan has questions for me. (This is a recent development! There was a time…) Here’s one: “Chuck, what’s your preferred travel case for that little acoustic of yours? My upcoming logistics feel impossible. Do you check it or try to carry on?”
I tell him soft cases rule the land now. When it comes to Telecasters, for sure. But with an acoustic? You take your chances. Will they have room for it in the overhead? Will it fit in the bin? It might, but either way it will add stress to your day.
“Good advice,” Dan allows. “I loved when you instructed a bunch of aisle standers that the plane should be emptied like pews in a church. Classic. I did hear a new term for passengers that crowd around before boarding: Gate Lice. Ha!” Gate Lice. Also known as the Shanghai principle. Does anyone remember Southwest Airlines only having three groups? A, B and C? Now boarding is like a Rubik’s cube. Gotta make the sides all line up!
Flying is definitely a lot less glamorous lately, I concede. Maybe adjust your expectations. (Okay, that last part is all-purpose advice that somehow fits every situation, from politics to lunch specials – to flying.)
Then again, people do surprise me with their kindness every once in a while. All you can do is smile.
Dan closes off with, “I need a valet, like Trump has. I’m also worried about flying in general, I hear passenger behavior has deteriorated and the carriers are pulling all sorts of shenanigans.”
True enough, though. Dan adds, “Hey, where’s that tunnel Elon promised?”
Go see Dan. See Dan sing. See Dan play acoustic. See Dan read. Get there before it gets banned by the new Board of Education!
I just stare at the seat back in front of me.
People drive themselves insane. Grinding their gears. Some just don’t seem to have any cool. Because you have to have a reserve of cool. You have to be able to dip your bucket down there and bring it up anytime you need it. And you never know when you’ll need it.
You are your own company. Bring a book.
I see people on planes fidgeting. Slowly going nuts. Getting up, sitting down, getting up, sitting down, getting up… Throwing open the overhead compartment, shuffling things around up there, slamming it shut. They plop back down. Put premium headphones on. And after any announcement, like, oh say… “the local time is…” they yank those headphones down, twitch their head around like a nervous cat, turn to me in my sad middle seat all breathless: “What’d they just say?“
Cramming into the aisle the moment we land. Knock yourself out, folks. It gives me the chance to study your Dockers six inches from my face.
It helps to have some cool. Keep it with you. You need to know how to spin down the inner hard drive at will. There’s a room inside your head. You can hang in there. Stay as long as you like.
Oh, and to my N Judah friends. People are getting on. People are getting off. It’s that easy. There’s a groove. You can fall into it. Go with it. There’s a community out there. It’s subtle. But it’s there. You may not be able to see it. But it’s there.
Otherwise you’re sunk. You’re on a sinking boat. And you don’t even know it. Doesn’t matter if it’s the N Judah or British Airways or the Outlaw Cruise, it helps to know how to spin down the inner hard drive.
And besides, people-watching on the N Judah is the best. It’s more interesting than any episodic TV.
Meanwhile, baggage claim is my life. So step away from the carousel!
Also, about the fine art of newslettering? In case you haven’t noticed, I’m still making this up as I go. Why not become a paid subscriber today if you’re not already? If not, you can always donate to Doctors Without Borders. They've been providing food, water and healthcare around the globe for 50 years. Or an abortion fund or any gun violence prevention group. They can ban abortions, but can’t seem to regulate guns.
You can also do none of the above and just carry on. We are happy to have you.
Onward,
-CP
green on red. there's a band I thought no body would ever mention again. what happened? why no reunion?
Well, that other Green on Red guy might have penned a book, but has he had one written at length ABOUT him? Harrumph!